I wish scraping a resin bowl could be considered cleaning.
i just made my gag reflex go away.
its taking every last moral i have not to steal this bike
you still have morals?
Well actually itd just be too hard to ride the bike with this large rake i just stole
yeah, it's no longer just 'day drinking' when it's 5pm and you're knocking over fruit displays at fresh market
we tried to steer you away from them but you just kept yelling 'i need dick' and going back. sorry.
24 hours later and my vagina is still tingling. That good.
He is now the second fuck buddy that i have met by walking up and grinding on him. My ass is so much more productive than dating
He left his own bachelor party to bring me weed. Then smoked with me. Tell me I'm not his favorite-ex-friends-with-benefits.
And he probably thinks I'm in love with him but after three shots of Patron you love anything
I found a video of us drunkenly yelling "we wanna be the Pope" as we passed around the blunt
My roomate had an hour long melt down about her life choices not realizing I was in the middle of having sex... So yea it went pretty horribly.
I'm questioning my decision to swallow this morning while my stomach was in hangover mode
I dunno that I'd be trusting enough of junkyard tequila to drink it.
i guess she just walked over ass naked and peed on his laptop. gonna call an over price on that drunk sex.
Just got drunk at the Cheesecake Factory again. Made me think of you.
That's the nicest thing anyone's ever said to me.
Randomize
