I'd suck a dick for hot wings now. A metaphoric dick that is
I've been sucking dick for sushi for weeks now...hasn't worked yet :P
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
When i walked in, you were in bed with a hot chick rolled up in a green blanket and said you were acting like a caterpillar..
So instead of getting the if-you-hurt-my-little-girl-youre-dead talk, i got the alcohol-is-our-friend talk, i like her dad already
I full on slapped a girl with pizza. Like in the face with sauce splattered everywhere and grease with a hard slap to the face.
I didn't scare your mother by showing up on the roof, did I?
Somewhere between yelling how am I gonna make it to my flight and more titie shots I stopped caring
So my bf wanted to cum on my face and I let him. Afterwards I wiped some off, wiped it across his forehead and said, "The king has returned".
Craig, a bottle of Jamison, and I had a party on the roof last night. No idea how I got down. My injuries indicate fall...
I'm sitting on our balcony drunk. And in my underwear. Our relationship with our neighbors may improve.
Can't tell if waking up covered in easy mac is the sign of an amazing or terrible night
Playing pong against a girl who fucked my ex boyfriend so that's how my nights going
Like I fucked him in the shower at 3 am when I had classes all day the next day so he can't say I'm not dedicated
I just woke up hand cuffed to the bar and shirtless, so yeah I think I need you to come get me.
i just used your hair clip to unclog my bong. i miss you so much!
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