After he came all over my face, he proceeded to give me a high five. I can't even act upset because I always put myself in these situations. Did I mention D3: Mighty Ducks was playing in the background?
So we fuck and I say, "I'm about to go." He tells me, "No, leave at ten.. just lay here for a little while." When I ask, "Why?!" He gets his feelings hurt and says, "ugh. or don't." Since when did guys start acting like girls?
I just want to make him a cookie cake that says "you have no chance with me."
and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
he would probably call me "ma'am" when he's inside me. people love saying weird shit inside me.
Quick question, how many times can you get chlamydia before your vagina just gives up and falls off?
I want "hickeys on my ass" sex
8===D
That's the bat signal to come over and fuck me.
I be dancing. See you soon. You can drink tequila from my pants.
Banging to Billy Joel pandora is like russian roulette. But I made him cum to Let It Be so I we both walked away victors
I woke up with the gnarliest cold/hangover combo
Thats what u get when u have butt ass naked rooftop sex at night in december
Worth it.
Since when do my one night stands start sending you friend requests?
Every Easter every single one the baby Jesus butt plug comes up
High me is so sweet. She left not-high me a fortune from a fortune cookie and 6 packets of soy sauce in my tampon drawer.
You sat outside petting a picture of your cat for hours... not even the real thing... just a picture.
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