He yelled GOOOOAAAALLL when he came.
make sure i look cute passed out on the couch.
In Canada she would be a 10 but here in America she's only a 7
Yes theres a double standard. Get over it. Fuck the critics and go be the slut you were born to be
I sent her 8 pictures of my dick in a baked potato. Not sure how I thought that would get me laid later.
I have mastered the 3 minute room cleaning drill in preparation for the nights possible slam-piece
He's trying to marry me, when is the appropriate time to tell him my real name and that Dallas is a completely fictitious slutty alter ego? I need the advice of someone with morals.
In case you're wondering where my head is at right now, it's wishing that I was getting laid and not having a debate about cheese.
We're getting paid a considerable amount of money to send each other pictures of our dicks...
WHY IS IT FROWNED UPON THE DRESS UP IN CAT COSTUMES AND SIT OUTSIDE OF BARS WITH A BOX OF WINE I THOUGHT THIS WAS AMERICA
We started off talking about nice cuddling and you turned it into fucking with a Santa hat on...
Got home. All the lights were on. All the doors were unlocked. My room was covered in beads, there's puke in the sink and of course our toilet is still broke. I'd say it was a decent Mardi Gras
There's nothing quite like having a little 8 year old boy hand me a Bible on campus while I'm on my way to the health center because of my recent slutty tendencies.
no it was
but you compared your dick to a female disney character
The only people allowed to make me cry are myself and Chris Hemsworth as Thor. And me.
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