just did a line in a complete hula outfit off a chick in a devil costume. do you think hell will be this good?
I wonder what it would be like to masturbate in space
i think im having one of those erections lasting four or more hours
I think the puke all over the side of my car actually improves its appearance.
im sleeping in a hamic at a mansion. best hangover ever
After we had sex he bought me grape soda. I think I'll keep him.
So much for not drinking this week after this weekend.. Congratulations. U made it until tuesday.
Hiding the dark circles under my eyes this morning was like trying to hide a Beached Whale on the Couch eating Pita chips.
Woke up in your shoes. Please tell me you woke up in mine
I just bought a bong from a hot dog stand.
I almost forgot to feel shameful, if that answers your question.
All I ever do is give guys anxiety problems and flaccid penises.
Currently googling hangover cures, which looks a lot like working from the perspective of my boss.
I've never seen so much of my blood outside me. After the initial shock it was kind of cool.
I don't really care where everyone ended up, but is everyone alive and not in jail?
Not in jail
Alive?
Randomize
