i am not above fucking your little sister on your bed
the people going to church this morning while i was walking home did not seem as pleased as i was with how many beads i earned last night
I hope my liver is having as much fun as I am
She walked in, looked at the bed, sniffed, sighed, and went to grab her cleaning supplies. I'd say she knows.
You might have crossed the line by jerking off while she was in the bathroom taking a prego test. Just saying
Can I bring home a duck? Dead serious
I remember you licked my face and said that's all you're getting
i need to stop establishing animals as safe words. Giraffe and Penguin are really awkward words to say during sex
I rammed pretzels and Jell-O shots down the throats of those I loved.
Let's never forget the time I met you while you were running down the street naked and in handcuffs.
Just learned a valuable lesson today. Don't open snap chats from 3 am the next morning while sitting next to a small child. They totally saw your dick.
He called me kiddo. We can't have sex
there's a 50/50 chance the night will end in alcohol-induced rituals of satanic nature
You're lucky I just like fucking you because you would really suck at being a boyfriend.
Think he has a gf
Yea that shit doesn’t necessarily stop me
Randomize
