I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
I'd be surprised if he had a problem with boundaries after helicoptering his penis in front of you
I met her at the liquor store. I hope I'm wearing a condom
He apologized for his naked psychotic episode and then we had goodbye sex on his sailboat
I know it's pride week, but your asshole is just never supposed to taste like banana.
For gods sake, I only took one. With two nyquils. What a happy world its been today. Fulfill your obligations and then its marvelouso.
When I get home we should play "let's see how many Christmas movies we can watch before we start having sex."
Just had a heart to heart with my John Belushi poster.
I just looked into the eyes of the man whose car I peed on last night
please, i've had weekends with less dignity than this.
Would it be weird if your parents sold me weed?
I'm on a treadmill at the gym ordering pizza on my phone so it'll get to my house around the time I get home. I NEED HELP. Or I'm a genius. I haven't decided.
I was picked up from his hotel room at 5 a.m. and came home with my panties and jäger in a McDonald's bag so the desk attendant wouldn't judge me. This is what single at 25 is about.
so in other words, they broke and fell off and I ate a gummy life saver off of his balls
Also my roomates are going to be gone till sunday. Make correct decision here
Quit calling your parents your roomates
Randomize
