bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
Ok never mind. Thought i pooped my pants for a second. False alarm.
I feel like i'm in "To Catch a Predator - The Musical"
Took her home last night and it was like trying to put an oyster in a slot machine. I may have drank a little too much.
hey did I tally my arm again of # of shots?
nope, you were tallying rejections at the party
just heard some guy walking down the street say "butt sex in the sun"
go get him tiger.
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
I kept reassuring him that I was easy like Sunday morning, not easy like "I've had 6 shots of tequila and haven't had sex in three months"
I'm eating cheerios out of the palm of my hand while I pee with the door open. Is this adulthood?
He drank his beer out of his own shoe. Its his "party trick"
So I can confidently say that I'm the only 3rd year engineering student who completed all 4 of their exams with One Direction pens
Well, I just bought plan b with the tips I made from the job that I slept with my manager. So yeah, that's my life. How's yours?
I woke up on a different floor than I went to sleep on. Can't find my shoes.
I need to hurry up and get over my feelings for him so next year's tipsy reunion sex won't be clouded by emotions.
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize
