I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
He cooked the food on a paper plate in the oven.
i just remembered that i beat off next to you while we were naked and passed out next to each other after last night... No Homo
my fingers and penis are no longer on speaking terms. My penis is too jealous of where my fingers get to go.
something came early last nite... and lemme tell u it wasn't christmas...
I think all I remember saying is, "I love Chris Berman's voice" and then I passed out
u girls! girls! girls! have fun please don't hook up w/ a roadie! Love, mom
I have a meeting at work in an hour, I'm so hungover going outside is NOT happening there are roads and shit I'll totally get myself killed.
I was short on money so I let my roommate mase me for $60
Hahaha I don't remember taking it away. But no one should have a sledgehammer at a party. NO ONE.
he puked all over my guest bed and the said he felt good enough to clean it up. he poured bleach all over the bed and passed out in it. he had the chemiacal burn for a month...
Her roommate was talking on her cell when I came out of the bedroom and I definitely heard her describe how shitty and terrified I looked. Awesome.
She was two things I dont understand: tall and Christian
I got a discount on the lube for giving the cashier focaccia bread from work.
Just set the kids up with doughnuts downstairs so I could go up and masturbate uninterrupted. I am such a good mom.
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