I have had sex with more partners than how old he is.
literally had 100 drinks last night.
What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
the line runs infront of fredricks of hollywood. it's like gamestop is showing me how pathetic I am.
Not quite sure what happened last night. I'll drive your dresser over to you later.....
I legit had to pull him off my car. Then he texted me saying 'take me places.' Shotgun getting that drunk tonight
I might've decided it was a good idea to try to steal all of the pool balls at the pub... I apologize in advance that we now need to become regulars somewhere (anywhere) else.
Remembering I sold my brand new Blackberry to a stranger for a few pints = Worst night of my life. Now to work out what I did with my shoes.
I know how to say Yes, No, and Your Mother's Vagina. So almost fluent.
Its summer. Time to get to the freshmen before the weight does.
I feel like someone poured gasoline and bleach in my nose and lit it on fire.
Why! I don't feel that at all!!!! I feel jipped
Walk of shaming into my apartment. No one to clap me in. Come home!
Idk you're asking me for advice on dating bro, after I told you I got a convicts number today.
it's unicorns you uncultured swine
Started mixing booze directly into the 2 liters and carrying them around. Mixing less often, and now kind of weightlifting,so double effecient.
Randomize
