Thanks again for letting me crash last nite. Sorry I banged your little brother.
I think we should urban dictionary "drive of shame." It involves a sprint to your car in his underwear and shirt, surreptitiously trying to put on your bra on at stoplights without attracting attention from neighboring cars, and lurking in your car a block from home so you can know when your roommate leaves for work.
I showed him my bush... on skype.
so high. i feel like my whole body is a boner
This place doesnt have redbull or serve shots. Its like they are at war with fun.
Don't judge me. If you're going to fall off a bed you might as well do it gracefully into a bag full of beer.
So he was supposed to be helping me with my math but instead we ended up drinking coconut rum in his basement and having sex. I think my mom was right, getting a tutor will be good for me. Relieves the stress.
The fire alarm went off at 3 am in the freshmen dorm. So guess which junior everyone now knows is hooking up with a freshman? This girl...
You told me you would ride a pig into the night sky screaming, "I wear my sunglasses at night"
Goldenshlager is a hell of a drink. And these are the adventures ur missing out on w me. I gave someone a bath Emily. A BATH.
Awkward
Can't say I wouldn't let it happen again.
Well I think I made it pretty obvious I wasn't in to it. I was drinking a beer while he was going down in me
in honor of breaking bad starting soon, i am now banging a walter white lookalike. viva heisenberg!
I re-seduced my fuck buddy...must be the luck of the Irish!
I stole $10 from the guy I hooked up with last night.Not sure why but it was definitely more satisfying.
Sorry for prompting a philosophical penis discussion at 10:45 on a Friday night.
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