I thought smoking would make her look better, but all it did was enlighten me to her snaggletooth
Sounds like a blessing in disguise
Girls don't like it when you cum inside them and then discuss baby names.
If I remember taking any of my finals after tomorrow night, it will not have been a successful night.
Left for charity run at 5AM. Saw a pigeon eating last night's vomit and a pair of shame-walkers in high heels. Nature at it's finest.
this guy had a colored tattoo of Chucky on his leg, whatever drugs he does, i want them
That bad?
Full length cargo pants, running shoes, and a partial unibrow. Alcohol really is blinding.
she screamed "my eye!" and it brought me a surge of bad memories. except she was yelling about a lemon.
So far, my day has been sparkling with the tears of a thousand rainbow unicorns. I'd say this is quality shit you've grown.
He fucked me so hard I had an asthma attack. I'm like the sickly poster child for celibacy.
She told me about it right after. She said she was scared I would be disappointed. And I was, but I pretended not to be. Which pretty much sums up our relationship.
Just saw some lesbians get in a fistfight in an Arby's parking lot. It's good to be home.
I just had a drunk lesbian experience.... How do I break it to my boyfriend??
Your vagina needs to teach my vagina its ways.
I told him I wanted to fuck him and he hasn't texted me back in 4 days...am I missing something
I want to find him again. His Corona tank top and I were made for each other.
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