if all i could do was poop and smoke weed, i'd be eternally happy
amen to that sister
Too much gin, very little bucket
Ya! She had a north face on tho so she was a classy hooker.
So me and friend just finished Eiffel towering this girl and sounds great in theory but after the high five has commenced its just a weird threesome especially when you make eye contact with your buddy during the session
Theres a dude at this concert at the urinal double fisting beers, taking drinks from both while simultaneously pissing euerywhere. He is my hero
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
I'm sorry I kept calling you a pussy... but to be fair, you were being a pussy.
Come down. Bring Jorts. We're getting ready for this tricycle race like champions.
Our neighbors just passed us a blunt from their deck, and are hooking us up.
I just baked them cookies. We're friends now.
It's ok that you're screwing someone else while trying to get back with me, I'm banging three girls while I ignore you.
I was having the most awesome dream about onion rings and you hit me and told me to stop touching you...WTF?
This feeling I'm having... is it love or a combination of alcoholism and unprotected rough sex
I grinded with the guy who brought the scooter, I'm leaving with success
We can talk about your dick in my throat after a decision is made, this is my hair we're talking about. .. shit's important.
My liver is whispering mean things about me to my kidneys. It's a fucking miracle I'm not hungover. Lol
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