OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
I called her a whore. 15 minutes later she gave me head at arby's while i was eating a roast beef. best afternoon ever
Abreva sucks. I applied it as directed and now it looks like I fed the herpes. They're throwing a party on my bottom lip.
i just did the math...im a product of my mothers birthday sex
She just told me she blew the waiter in the bathroom. Should I still leave a tip?
I got asked if I was pregnant as a pickup line
I can't believe that 100lb chick tackled me through a flight of stairs
We don't have sex anymore. We both agree that the olympics are more important to watch. All day. Also i don't look good compared to the athletes...
No he's great. He's trying to do "sexy stuff" for me now, which is pretty hilarious. He stirred my daiquiri with his penis last night. He also tied a bouquet of flowers around it.
Please show REO speedwagon ur boobs for me.
Not only did my parents pick me up from his hotel room in the morning, but he also came outside and had a casual little chat with my dad through the driver's side windrow.
Drunk me has cost me a lot in cell phones...
But forealz I'm gonna need a solid 52 orgasms so hydrate.
Pretty sure he was in my class in like 2nd grade
I like how you know everyone I've ever fellated.
Randomize
