well you haven't lived until you've been 86'ed from a family restaraunt
under NO circumstances is it acceptable to fist pump to taylor swift
She just sat there, all alone, with a bottle of booze. And the dog. He even looked like he didn't wanna be there with her.
yeah, but the likliness of me finding my husband at a party where the facebook event is titled "NEW YEARS EVE SHIT SHOW" is highly unlikely
We're too lazy too send a pic of out balls. Just assume this is a pic of our balls and respond accordingly.
He started to lose his balance halfway through his "commencement speech" at the top of the staircase. The rest is bloody, profanity-laiden history.
In fairness it was pretty good sex, but I still wasn't expecting the mass cheering and applause he got on leaving my tent
Just seen a chubby version of you. Nearly kidnapped her. Perfect woman
Well I woke up and my arm was bleeding. And my blood is on the wall in the hallway.
Umm
No idea. I blame fireball.
Valid.
What was my myspace song when I went away to rehab?
Took my plan b at Costco today, sample Sunday for the win.
That makes sense.. A good Bj is a trump card in any argument
Dilemma. I'm out of wine and I can't put on clothes to go to the liquor store bc I just got spray tanned. If this isnt white girl problems I don't know what is.
I don't remember that much at all. But I guess I met this guy from New Zealand and his dog, and then I punched someone in the face.
Do you remember vividly describing the shape and girth of my cock to that girl last night?
Randomize
