I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
Packed at 6 am completely wasted. Damage assessment: 12 pairs of socks (no underwear), a flashlight, 3 shorts, shot glass, 8 sweaters, puff paint, one sneaker.
remember what we learned. dont lure girls w/ food at the bar. u dont want those ones
there's nothing like that first "just failed out of my program" beer
The lack of respect you have for your penis baffles me. I'd rather rub my ball sack on public toilet seats than stick my dick in some of those girls.
A simple 'no' would have sufficed
she left out the fact that she had a kid until she told me not to suck on her tits too hard or milk would come out.
and on the second day it was tequilla tuesday. and the lord saw it was good.
I'm drinking beergaritas with a dog who is high and a baby
your completely serious
I love your family. Oh. And on a completely unrelated note, I know where we can steal a dog.
I can't tell if I'm getting better at doing my online spanish hw drunk or if my teacher is just grading on creativity. Either way that senoritas gettin an applebees gift card when i graduate.
I'm gonna write a book one day about how to be the less attractive person girls settle for after getting dumped. I will send you a copy
Look. When I let you cum on my tits don't fuck it all up by going "SKEET SKEET SKEET" it just pisses me off.
this hangover isn't hhappening. im not letting it
its winning. its definitely happening
All I remember is being lured out to sit by the fire by you holding a piece of pizza in front of me
Randomize
