I just answered "If only I knew" for a quiz in criminology, she loved it. I got an A
HOW DID U BEAT A GAY GUY IN GAY CHICKEN?
I assume it was your influence that had me go from DD to waking up out on the deck with one eyebrow shaved off??
you were trying to control your nosebleed while having someone hold your four loko while you drank it through a straw. all at the same time. that is commitment.
put me on a leash or i'm going to fuck someone
Ripped lines in the bathroom before my presentation.. Got bonus marks for my enthusiasm.. This is why I love drugs
I just ran into mom and dad day drinking at the bar while I skipped class and was day drinking at the same bar.
You and the dog were competed for the water dish
I just had the weirdest moment. Made eye contact at the bar with a girl who has seen my vagina.
I was so drunk last night dude. I woke up this morning to my oven being wide open and my pants on the kitchen floor.
Which one of you fucks put a bounty out on my brother's virginity?
WHY IS THERE A GOLD FISH IN MY BONG??
Is it bad that if I found out I couldn't have kids I'd be more pissed that I've been using unnecessary condoms than the fact that I'll never be a mother?
I came home in someone else's underwear this morning
Atleast you got a souvenir
Your penis caused this!
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