Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
Is it normal that I have to take off my pants to get mouth stitches removed?
I've slept with so many tools that you'd think my pussy was Home Depot.
I'm a fake celebrity on twitter. I need a life.
and ill be dreaming of you. not in a creepy way, but in an inappropriate way
I mean I had a leg brace. It would have been irresponsible for me to be on top.
He waited til after we had sex to tell me he had herpes... Ugh I hate being drunk
Hey, no judgement here...this is the girl that threw up on a box of kittens at the magician's house
She's trying to figure out what kind of dinosaur I am... Yay codeine.
Knowing that he goes to voodoo every Thursday really makes me want to get myself checked.
I've just stalked all the hot guys who have clicked "attending". I now know which guys are "yes", "maybe" and "no". I only hope my drunk self remembers.
I don't think anybody else enjoys making out with multiple guys on the same night as much as I do. I'm like a wine taster but with lips... it's like art to me. The bruise on my upper lip is proof of it
You peed all over his floor and had a bottle popped in your ass when you passed out. Don't tell me I'm "still living in my college days"
A guy I don't even know just ate me out on a washing machine at a random persons afterparty. I came as it was going through spin cycle.Just kept thinking "who does laundry during a party?"
Tell me that I didn't just get ash in my Russian and just mix it TF in bc who cares and life has no meaning.
Randomize
