hey remember that time we got really drunk, you tried to find narnia in my refrigerator and passed out in the freezer drawer??
no.
there are two kinds of girls in this world: my mom, and sluts.
Had to make a piece of abstract art. Your dick is in it
hey did i steal that bike before or after the ball dropped, casue i might have broken my resolution already
whatever a "slut portfolio" is, mine is apparently almost complete
He said "I wish they sold 40's in bars".. and a business plan came to mind. Maybe I CAN do something with my degree...
I just want to jump into a ballpool of dicks now.
I'd like to introduce you to my friend, Moderation. Enjoy each other's company this weekend.
Your friend and I already don't get along
Just say you're the husband at the front desk to get in. She's in room 15 at the ER.
what? who is this?
Next sat night Titanic party. Bring your floaties, trashy necklaces, and a large lung capacity. This ship is going downnnnnnn.
Eating an ice cream sandwich while your little bro gets me weed. May I adopt him?
You better keep a close eye on your uterus tonight cause I am looking good.
A bee came out of the shoe box and stung her. Even the insect community doesn't want her in those hideous things.
Apparently I was drunk enough to call he police station and ask if there was a problem with me.
may or may not have entered into a gay civil rights discussion with 6 year olds. Hint: I did.
Randomize