Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
Question: If I woke up with one eyebrow mysteriously missing, do I shave the other one to match?
i came out of the bathroom and he had christmas lights wrapped up his leg, around his boner, and down the other side
Look I'm sorry I shaved your cat, but get over it.
He said he had bite marks on his back... Turns out he had to throw me over his shoulder, and I was really reluctant.
We found you on the floor drooling you kept saying over and over how you were double jointed.
Not only was there cake on the wall but someone shoved cake and meat in a cup and put it in the fridge.
Jen gave my number to some guy she met in NY. He sent me a picture of his weiner. He had nice shoes. I replied with a pic of bacon.
When in doubt always reply with bacon.
just gonna show up naked this time. that way i dont have to worry about finding my clothes tomorrow
So I vote that we skip the bowling and just go straight to destroying our livers.
Security has videotape of her blowing the boss against his car. Don't they know he entire parking lot is under video surveillance?
I'm eating taquitos in the bathtub at 5:30 am. What a great end to the night
He wants to buy me a wedding ring and pretend to be married to someone else when we fuck. It actually makes me wet thinking about it.
what happened last night?
we watched you eat an entire bag of dorritos in the pouring rain... you refused to come inside
I threw up all of my purple drank and thats really important
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