Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
This pizza tastes like mashed potatoes. HOW HIGH DO YOU THINK I AM?
the clerk said it was the first time she had ever seen someone walk in the next day to return the tux still wearing the tux
All she said was "the usual?" and unzipped my pants.
you know...the drug dealer i named my baby after.
No you are right. With a nickname like Monster Cock, you shouldn't expect him to want to "just talk". I'd be insulted too
MISSING: One left eyebrow. Reward if returned.
You have permanently scared my back with your nails. I would like to congratulate you on a job well done.
I let him fuck me in a batman costume. Don't talk to me about needing to read fifty shades gray.
Theres a point where you stop and say hey....as high as I am on LSD right now ...I`m just a man covered in paint
I'm 50% okay with that amount of body contact... plus/minus 7% based on where blood may flow.
I woke up with a bagel in my mouth, still ate it. Free breakfast
There's times when I just want to bottle my farts for later they're so insane.
I fucked a French man last night. 5 Times. Ashed my cig in his cactus. That later set on fire while we were having sex.
Nice classy night out before we roll our faces off
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