She just wrapped her tongue around my thumb.....lizard girl may be my next wife.
my love horoscope just told me to "say it in frosting" should i take this literally?? i think yes.
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
When I eventually hook up with a resident lets refer to it as taking a hands on approach to my job
After 3 dates I think I'm failing at painting the "sweet guy with a future" picture and more painting the "this is the guy to call when you've run out of options and want to get fucked in half drunk to forget about it" picture.
You passed out with your mouth on the faucet, straddling the keg, with your arms wrapped around it
I can't help that I bring out the sex in people
And we had three hours of crazy sex then his roommate ate pizza off me while I was sleeping.
I was about to google "rabies and sexual activity." Then I realized I was at work.
Living alone for four weeks has given me unrealistic expectations of pantslessness.
I'm not trying to take your husband away from you, but can we have another 3way soon? I'm just desperate for good dick.
Who loses their virginity to fucking Flo Rida
Just try not to have a boner when you're giving your best man speech, it will really kill the vibe
I can't believe he's mad at you for not remembering your fake anniversary.
how early is too early to start drinking over the gilmore girls revival
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