If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
Rub youre cunt and tell me you love me.
Your incorrect use of you're doesn't arouse me in the slightest.
he smelled like listerine and beef tacos
He fucked volume into my hair. It was amazing.
A DRUNK EMT IS BETTER THAN NO EMT!!!
She crossed her eyes and threw up into a glass while sitting at the bar. It was fifty shades of sketchy dude.
Put some vodka in it
Its 7am
put some vodka in it
The cops just came to this party I'm at and ate all of our snacks
Dude just crushed our bbq lays and told us to quiet down
i know i saw many looks of jealousy when i walked solo into subway carrying a cheesy gordida crunch after taco bell closing hours
I'm sure for most of the people, it was the one and only miracle they will see
I'm hungry, horney and thirsty. Pick two you want to help out with.(please pick horney)
You know you threw a brownie at my head last night. And said you did it to defend the turtles honer....
So, I actually said the words "but face tattoos are sexy"
He's mad at me because I said I wouldn't date him if his dick was smaller. I fail to see the issue
the guy in front of me in walmart is buying a blowtorch, potato chips, and condoms. I'm curious and horrified at the same time.
2020 sucks, I want a refund
Randomize
