Needless to say when I told my parents they loved me less
my mom just found my bong and asked what it was. I told her it was a hookah
and she bought it?!?
yeah...but her friends at work told her hookah was fun and now she wants to smoke it with me...im thinkin yes
I should be nowhere even remotely near facebook in this condition.
I feel as though I could trust her, I mean she did tell me she was married before we had sex.
He was visibly upset that you'd rather eat nachos than have sex with him.
Nothing says "welcome to Denver" like a hot 18 year old giving you directions to the dispensary and ending up blowing you in the backseat
I went to the obgyn with chipped nail polish.. Somewhere Beyonce was looking down, shaking her head, whispering "Not fierce."
I'm just going to have crazy good sex with him until one of us developed feelings that works in the movies right?
Reminder: You could have had sex with me while wearing a tiara.
We peed on campus in the middle of the tailgate and then hit on a married cop that asked you to stop touching him
Well, we 69'd in the Jacuzzi. If that tells you the kind of night I had. Neither of us knew we could hold our breath that long. Deff. Most. Dangerous. Sex. Ever.
What, so now you are his nutritionist and his fuck buddy?
You started having a threesome right in front of me.
lololol that's what happened?
Stephanie looked me right in the eye while she was going down on you. It made me really uncomfortable.
I’m doing some soul searching to figure out how much of a slut I’m going to be the rest of the summer.
I HATE BEING THIS HIGH FML IT'S LIKE I'M MAKING UP FOR ALL THE 4:20S I DIDNT DO ALL AT ONCE
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