McDonalds has hash browns for only a quarter!....how many u want?
All of them
About me waking up with a tatto of a hamster with a top hat ?
hey.....beach week happens
dude...I wrote 15 jersey shore quotes on her body. she is going to do the walk of shame with snookie on her forehead.
You yelled "bananas are an excellent source of pottasium!"4 times in the middle of class. how do you not remember?
I don't even know what potassium is.
just let her blow you already, it's practically animal cruelty at this point.
i sound like a 75 year old homeless man that has spent all his panhandling money on cigarettes since he was 12. that rough.
Apparently I took one a huge picture off the wall at the bar and was walking around dancing with it..
I figured out why her friends always say g is for god when she leaves with someone. She wears a double g cup bra
Let me tell you the story of bicurious george
first thing my tuition money buys is a strap on
This guy on Hoarders just said "we're all about 4 or 5 decisions away from shitting in a bucket". True dat
i refuse to give everyone the satisfaction of seeing the results of my acting on my thoughts
I literally can not watch Thor without thinking of your dick
I'm not sure why, but my salad smells like a Big Mac. Or maybe that's just the smell of yesterday's, seeping through my skin.
A sultry night of tacos and sex sounds nice. Should I bring home milk?
Randomize
