: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
At least we don't have one night stands
True that. We sink our claws in our men.
I might get fired at work today. I had to prioritize. It's not my fault Cockasaurus came over.
well i just set every background of each phone in the verizon store to my face
I woke up to him eating cereal out of my viking helmet with a shot glass. No idea where he got the milk.
It was like some kind of slut recycling operation. She gave me the shirt of the last guy she slept with in exchabge for mine so I didn't have to wear the same thing to work. She's been doing it for years
Note to self: Don't teach the naked lap rule in beer pong until after youve made a cup..
All I remember is yelling RUN as fireworks started going off in the kitchen. Who said that was a bad idea?
She just called to say she can support a full bottle of vodka between "the girls" now. I'm going over, don't try and stop me.
So was I the only one that was competing in the whale hunt?
we got kicked out of McDonald's because you kept screaming THAT SHIT CRAY at the woman in front of us because she ordered a fish filet.
...that shit cray.
Morning fuck and a coffee. ARE YOU READY TO CONQUER THE GALAXY WITH ME??
In the event that Ian's ex wife asks you, tell her I'm sweet snd innocent. No reason.
I woke up at 2 AM to find them in my living room with a radio flyer wagon full of milk glass plates and a Holstein cow. How am I going to explain this to my landlord!?!
you told me you wanted to be a soccer mom with a high tolerance then you put the bottle to your face
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