It's pouring out. I am cold, wet, and miserable.... Kind of reminds me of our sleepover last night.
This random guy asked me if I had downs. I was like up yours! And I got out of his car.
also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
If our dicks could shake hands in congratulations they would
that ring i bought was worth the 6 bucks. wore it to the bar, told some girl i was recently divorced and wasnt ready to take it off. just got laid. THRICE.
You don't take my phone while I'm passed out, have a three hour conversation on it with Dealer Dave, set up a date with him and NOT TELL HIM THAT HE'S NOT TALKING TO ME.
Codeine + Boredom = Sprinting between my front and back door.
My Bio teacher gave me extra marks for putting "deer with AK-47 seeking retribution" at the top of the food chain on my exam. 51% pass here i come!!
HELP A SISTER OUT. AND KEEP YOUR TONGUE OUT OF THE HUMMUS.
TOO HIGH TO FIGURE THIS SHIT OUT
I am the slutty bisexual glue that holds this friendship group together.
He looks like he's going to feed me a taco and then stab me. It's probably a good idea he's a lawyer
I just had to take a picture of someone whose testicles are bigger than my fists combined. Living the dream.
Hi I haven't talked to you since you bought legal marijuana-are you still stoned?
I loaned him a tie and then had to tie it for him. I'm like his weird lesbian girlfriend.
I called him my big strong man today. It's all downhill from here. Matching Christmas sweaters, here we come
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