I don't want to talk about it. He was like the Little Engine that couldn't get me off.
How am I still drunk? Whoever said breakfast is the most important meal obviously didn't skip dinner and go drinking.
It was like a secret agent hookup. No names, swift execution, get in- get out.
I can't. He's too cute and my tongue is too long.
Apparently I'm at the point in my life where I can wake up with a dick in my face and then go back to sleep
I was changing in front of my window and my neighbor text me saying, "nice pubes."
Basically I don't wanna put on pants...but I'm stoked for drinking my face off tomorrow.
In other news it turns out I like Heineken.. In a desert island kind of way
My card got declined when I tried to buy dippin dots at 2 am, the lady gave them to me for free because "I looked like I needed them."
That cat I follow on Facebook beat cancer so we're drinking tonight in celebration
11:30 you texted me saying he was on his way. 11:37 you said, "Oh my God that was terrible."
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
you know it was a good night when you wake up with a medal around your neck
I just punched myself in the vagina to prove a point. Please pray for me.
Omg, new summer goal: sex in a bouncy castle.
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