Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
if it were possible I'd exchange my vagina for a diff one on the black market.
im giving 12 year olds life advice. this is probably illegal somewhere.
My financial aid advisors would be so pissed if they knew I was spending my loan money on strippers
Pretending to care to care about playoffs in exchange for free shots. I'm sorry in advance.
its official: beach shits are the exact same as mountain shits
I am sitting here. Drinking from a bottle of vodka. Eating shredded cheese from a bag and waiting on him to pick me up after he finishes with his girlfriend. This is what dreams are made of.
When you get a chance, you should call Nick. He REEAAAALLLLLY wants to hear you make chewbacca noises.
Im breaking out the trunk vodka tonight, its been aged to perfection.
I see you met someone special
I had to get my boss birth control a work today. I knew going to ASU would come in handy in my career someday.
well he said my boobs made him believe in love at first sight so that's cool
You caught me at a bad time. I'm stoned enough that I'm ready to sleep but also not stoned enough that I wanna smoke again but also stoned enough to not wanna drive anywhere
My apartment is so clean right now, I should invite someone over for sex just so someone can see how clean it is.
my roommates are pretty pissed at me. they sent me out for ice and i came back with a kitten.
i should probably stop doing things just because i think they’re funny. i’m not going to.
Randomize
