haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
I think I gave almost everyone at that party the clap last night
I learned much from the teen babysitter: I can light a cigarette in a microwave.
Well, I just watched him puke into his pitcher at the bar, I doubt he cares about anything other than the fact that he needs a new beer.
we got hammered off table wine and i ended up biting my acrylic nail off so i could finger his butt.. ill never look at valentines day the same
Last time we were that stoned we made a "everything you can fit in the blender" shake. Didn't end well..
Now all we have to do is pretend we haven't seen each other naked. Work tomorrow is going to be FUN.
Update is I am officially king of Gettysburg. Tam and I are being threaded like royakt. In bought e ruined a drink
We now only communicate via Xbox messages. Living together is so easy
so as he was cumming he sort of growled with one eye squinted... for a moment there I thought I was fucking Popeye
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. It doesn't matter what it's about. Last text was about a homeless dude
You don't have issues. You're a consenting adult having sex at work. Go you.
Just saw my ex AGAIN. The constellation of gays must be at some sort of weird point with Mercury.
Want to sleep. Also want to see Alex on MDMA doing really stupid shit. Choices...
Do you think it's my receding hair line that makes all the milfs attracted to me??
Randomize
