How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
that shit musta been laced I laughed for two hours and everyone looked like penguins
My mom can no longer prohibit me from smoking pot..I sell to her boyfriend.
I just made easy mac in my blender. Beat that.
if theres anything i pride myself on, its my ability to look homeless.
what's an appropriate "I'm fucking your grandson but I'm trying to hide it" outfit?
then he tried to tell me how many times he had seen Scott's dick. his estimate was about 180 times. he thought I didn't understand.
Come find me, I'm the girl sitting alone in taco bell at 9 in the morning drinking concealed beer with a straw
Will you judge me if i do shots in my basement closet first? No? Okay good
We boned on a bench in a park, french people were walking by cheering us on. Totally acceptable
What guy invites over a booty call, gets all naked and then when the real fun begins and a condom is needed, claims to not have one? And wears socks THE entire time?
Orientation leader success, day 1: incoming freshman just ate out his first sorority girl. I gave him a 7/10.
you must be at least a level 5 friend to unlock my sexual orientation
You had all day to plan ahead & get mixers, so whose fault is this sobriety?
Highlight your past hook-ups. You've been stabbed, shot at, run over, and chased down the road...no you can't bring new bar bitch over here!
Dude she has a friend!!!!
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