we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
She challenged me to a game of rock-paper-scissors for her virginity. I love this girl.
we just did breakfast shots, I have a black eye and savage garden is on . Best weekend ever
I'm too drunk to be surrounded by this many indians
How do you manage to be drunk and a racial minority so often?
He suggested abortion before I finished the sentence. That was my plan too, but now I feel like should keep it just to prove how big of a dick he is.
I feel like hell. The amount of black beans I found in my hair tells me I hit rock bottom
I don't know if it was his cologne or his Jesus hair, but he was much more fuckable than last time I saw him.
Now that I think about it, it may have been the 6 pitchers of beer.
I have just figured that it takes exactly 2 and a half rums to clean the bathroom..
I am compiling a playlist that reminds me of all my best sexual encounters. It shall be called THE MUSIC OF MY VAGINA'S PEOPLE
STDs are my biggest fear, besides whales. They're so fucking big.
I'm wearing a utility belt filled with alcohol
i'm hungover but need to study so i had a vodka orange juice, three ibuprofen and an adderall for breakfast. what up med school
! asked the random counter guy from 7/11 for Percocet. he immediately called his hookup
sex on a roof was cool and all but that superhero argument was the best part of the night hands down
dude it was our first time and her hair caught on fire from the candles on the nightstand
There is no way that actually happened!
the smell of burnt hair covered up the sweaty sex smell.
Randomize
