I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
Yea...but the guy who is beating me has a ponytail. So actually, I'm the winner here.
let me put this in terms we both understand. he was the crunchwrap supreme of men--the perfect combo of all things manly, gooey and delicious. and ready for instant enjoyment.
she was sobbing drunk in the backseat about her dead cat and how the guy in the front seat didn't want to hook up with her
Drunkenly auctioned off my bed for 3 tequila shots
Just saw a dude hanging out a window upside down chugging a 60 of vodka. This weekend is big for everyone I guess
She said I told her "I'm to drunk to take your bra off." then she said I walked out completely naked to go watch tv.
Are taco bell cups microwave safe? I can't make that judgement right now
The only way I can describe this shit is male aloe vera plant in both looks and feel its standing in the toilet
Thanks for that....my girlfriend picked up my phone and saw that
i wonder if cab drivers are trained in the art of delivering girls back to their dorms on Saturday mornings. because mine was so nice that he dropped me off at the back of my building so no one would see me.
How frowned upon is it to take your vibrator into the tanning bed...because Operation: dripping wet is in full swing and I have a busy schedule
Also, I found this app that is basically a tamagochi from the 90's and now I finally have something to keep me busy at work!
Something I can get at drive through, boobs out, don't want to get out of the car
Is that your mom climbing in your window dude
Sorry I had sex in your backseat while everyone was in the car
It's quite alright. I found his shorts in my backseat, not sure what he was wearing when we dropped him off
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