if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
I just got wrote up for "repeatedly smelling like alcohol"
That was long passed due.
Going to have to start putting down newspaper if puking the bed is going to be a habit
I need you to come over. Im crying, day drinking and working out simultaneously.
I was cut off by 8, I need to rethink this breakup therapy strategy
There's someone howling in the parking lot. Haha.
Some guy Just sang about my ass on the street
It was terrible lyrics but I would have thrown my life savings into that guitar case if I had any.
I didnt realize until i got your email that what i've been missing in my life is someone to send me dog gifs
Are you coming down for 4/20 or does Easter kinda fuck that up for you?
Sometimes you have a glimmer of a heart and then I immediately remember you are dead inside.
As soon as he called me 'darling' in that Scottish accent... my pants just dropped.
Woke up way too warm in the middle of a spooning sandwich. Was working up a rant about still not wanting a threesome. Then I realized the littlest spoon was the dog. Might need to break up anyway.
As long as it's more "this is where i see an issue" vs "psst.... tiddies" then i have no argument
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