Little spoons don't ask big questions
no ping pong balls so we're playing beer pong with an ornament. you can't tell me that's not festive.
I've come to realize time passes slowest when I'm sitting in class, waiting for microwavable foods, working out, & giving head.
apparently I kept yelling at her that I wanted t-Rex sized lines. awesome
If you know any fat girls who would pay me for sex, I am low on money and morals right now
Found my phone laying in a snow angel outside my apt this morning.
I've taken to hiding pictures of us around his room so that he'll forever feel guilty for dumping me on Valentine's Day... And to potentially cock block any hook ups.
So watch family guy till our brains melt and then bang till our bodies hurt?
just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
i had a mental breakdown over a math asignment proposed to a glass of chocolate milk then burned my hands when i acidentally leaned on the stove i have the grill marks burned on my hands i can see them
its only been 20 minuts since i last saw you
We watched scrubs, then I got a shower blowjob which led to shower sex and the living room floor sex. Now she's baking cookies. I may not be studying, but I'm doing something right.
No just a slight sexual miscommunication which led to a little (lot) vomiting by one party and a bruised sternum on the other party involved.
I can't even make a guess how that goes.
Gonna be hard to top last New Year's Eve when the guy I blew came at midnight
I woke up naked and only wearing cowboy boots, wrapped in a curtain that was still attached to the pole
Does puke ruin car paint? Good thing it's raining.
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