Ummmm I went to see who was upstairs, he was the only one in his room so we had sex while the travel channel played in the background.
Oh good. Romantic. Still, I'm jealous of the sex.
Probably not, since he made me promise not to tell anyone it only lasted ten seconds.
Small dicks are the new regular sized dicks.
but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
Then we started crawling around on the floor because we couldn't get up so decided to be tigers instead. Gotta love power hour.
if it were possible I'd exchange my vagina for a diff one on the black market.
oh yeah I'm gonna practice throwing up so I can be ready for Friday night. and Saturday. Beth is back, diaper and all.
Just threw up at the bar from the heat. Fun change of pace.
Does she usually listen to trance and cut up broccoli when she's high?
I just want you to sit on my face and to tell you you're pretty. Most girls would leap at this opportunity.
he is allergic to cats. we can only glue dog hair on him. otherwise he might die and i dont want to be responsible for that.
ahaha ok
let's call it "werewolfing"
All I remember is lecturing my dog about how she's a lucky bitch to have a structured eating and shitting schedule.
As I am reading this. I'm standing in my underwear eating taquitos. I'm saying this in the most loving way possible: FUCK OFF.
they have a video of him in his boxers making a snow angel in the hallway is his own vomit and coca cola.
Jungle juice breakfast? No? Ok.
She looked up and said "I like this." I asked "what do you like?" she said "penis."
Randomize
