How do you tell someone they are only invited if they put out?
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
I'm currently blowing up the downstairs bathroom at work. I wish I could foursquare this.
mom brought her knitting needles with her. its bad enough to be in the ER on new years, but to be with the knitting parent!?
Police were closing down the bar due to gunfight and I was crying because they wouldn't let me finish putting temporary shamrock tats on my boobs
I never thought the first time a taser would be used on me would be at an applebees
i had a threesome. one of the guys used to bully me in high school too for being gay.
I JUST WANT TO HAVE MILDLY SOCIALLY ACCEPTABLE SEX WITH HIM AND CALL HIM CUPCAKE.
I didn't know what happened last night until the bruises in the shape of hands showed up on my boobs. Then it all made sense.
blowjobs from left handed girls are noticably better than from righties. these are the most important things I've learned this semester
Yeah i was handcuffed to the bed all night but i actually slept like a baby
i just found a red feather stuck to my penis and i really wanted to send you a picture but too much
Omg you can't vacuum salsa that's just ridiculous
That's just how I roll. I drink, then tell people I'm either not wearing underwear or I'm training to be a stripper.
He nicknamed his dick "the fountain of youth" I think it's time to move on...
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