operation have a gay friend backfired
today is my dealer's birthday. i dont know whether to give him the day off or call him saying happy birthday ill take a quarter please
seeing an 80 year old woman puke in the bushes changes everything...
that's spring break in florida for ya
its 4:30 pm. In the mall. Just threw up into my hands. I love Vegas and Vegas loves me
I hit him with a car. Nothing says I hate you more than backing into someone with a fucking car.
She sat on the stairs and yelled sex positions at us. I don't remember if we went along with it but judging by the beer and condoms I'm thinking yes.
This is why i like single justin better. my only regret is not being present for more of his short life. may he rest in peace
If life deals in absolutes, the in betweens are the most hairy.... Fortune cookie wisdom from a stoned Megan.
The whole movie was ruined when some chick started laughing with what you could tell was QUITE the mouthful. This of course made the guy laugh harder.
So half of us were already throwing up outside when the Ukrainians ask us if we're ready to start partying yet. I love this country.
He said the last thing he remembered thinking was: 'Why is this vagina spinning?' Too drunk sex is no ones friend.
I approve. Last time I was there, I left E's room to get a drink of water. Found M sitting on the kitchen counter in his boxers hammered and eating a banana. He proceeded to feed me the rest of his banana then went to bed with the lights on. You two will be great.
High-fiving last weekend's hook up in passing on the way to class has given me quite the lady boner.
I'm just hoping that with all the times he's puked in my yard a mushroom field might grow.
Never going back to jail again. Only time in my life I've ever had a wet dream about jerking it...
Randomize
