Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
I forgot to tell you. I'm at a porno shoot today.
do you think he would believe thats it not really my period, and that i ate a lot of licorice?
You know you had good weekend wheb we you hook up with three different girls and you don't feel no pain when u pee in the morning
you had sex with a 30 year old who doesn't have a cell phone but does have an 8 year old son.
he's 29.
I knew I was high when I wanted to write a poem about how great it felt to wash my face
Sorry about giving you those ripped gym shorts after my dog ate your pants, but after the awkard BJ incident I didn't plan on hearing from you again
You dont lie about slip and slides
I think I threw my underwear away at What-A-Burger last night.
Someone just bought me a one liter long island and call me maybe is on. I'm going to die
It summer and it's getting a lot harder to hide sex bruises from my parents.
First world problems?
New rule for Thursdays: no high gymnastics
Moral of the story: always keep condoms in your bra
He's my favorite late night booty call. He lives next to a Wendy's.
My husband is waiting until son is napping and air humps as a seduction tactic. Pray for me.
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