i just rode the bull and i see vomit in my future.
i'm home, then i'll come over
ightttt gangstaaaaaaaaaaaa
nvm.
Yeah, but thats the third time she's peed on me.
Either he has two lazy eyes or he really likes my tits..
Today I made a list of everyone I have had sex with...there is more than double my age...
new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk.
I just sat through a State Farm mortgage Insurance commercial to watch a Trick Daddy video. Is this the target audience they are going for here?
1 month til my stepdad becomes a u.s. citizen, so if you want to get in on the divorce pool its your last chance, $5 a square.
They conduct scientific research memoirs about what sort of shit happened last night after I ate those cookies.
I know I've wanted to fuck him for the past month, but when you're that hungover, the only chemistry you have is with a pillow and a gallon of water.
Turns out she left way earlier. So I'm stuck with this guy asking where he can score meth and if I'm really straight.
You were on the train yelling, "THIS TRAIN NEEDS TO GO FASTER SO I CAN GO HAVE SEX WITH MY BOYFRIEND!!!"
I'm glad we smoked together,that was probs the biggest sibling bonding we will ever have.
Had a job interview today. Walked into the room and said "IT'S GO TIME, BITCHES".
Randomize
