yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
NBC reported that a group almost has enough signatures to submit pole dancing as an Olympic sport in 2016...
God I fucking love America.
I just found a pubic hair on my dick that wasn't mine.
This girl just introduced herself as Queefer Sutherland. She's on a roller derby team. What. The. Fuck.
He grabbed onto my boobs while slipping on ice then proceeded to drag me down with him I'm not predicting head in his future
Did I crawl through the hotel lobby all the way to our room?
Her vagina smelled like pancake batter. That's all you need to know.
Dude, it could be so much worse. That Dale kid lost a toe I think.
party devolved into two exes battling with Cal's tiki torches, and the lawn being set on fire kinda sorta and then we all hula'ed... hulaed?
I'm fine with our borderline lesbian behavior.
I fit in backpacks. BOOM HERE I AM! Like a stripper from a cake.
Just went grocery shopping with a vibrator in my purse and didn't even realize it. This is what Saturdays are made for.
I just met a stripper in the light of day who I ate a candy bikini off her body. This is how my weekend is going.
dude I fucking saw you snort tequila
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