Yeah, where have you been?
Clearly not facebooking enough. Sweet jesus.
he doesn't have near as many excuses as you..and his are usually pretty legit. like "i'm having a baby." that's pretty legit.
he said i was so drunk that i shared a urinal with him and we simultainiously peed
Howd you meet this guy?
I found him next to my pants on sunday morn.
There was a note in my hello kitty underwear telling me "don't go over 9000"
I don't remember what happened but judging from the contents of my pockets it had something to do with potatoes and glo in the dark condoms
It was awkward at first he now knows I fucked his little brother, they were both there. then the tequila kicked in and everything was fine.
i have a queen bed, a cherrywood bed frame, and gold sheets. how are you saying no to me right now?
A reason for us to be drunk all week National Singles Week
If you don't fuck me hard, rough, and senseless the minute we're alone in your room, I'm returning you to the boyfriend store
All I want is some guy to eat me out while I work on grad school things then go on his way
My son's girlfriend just thanked me for having good penis genes.
This should be illegal
It is
I mean more illegal... I shouldn't have this
Bud light made chelada as a breakfast for those of us with class at 8 am
Put down the Captain Crunch and get over here. It’s a dickfest!!
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