i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
I feel like my whole life has been one big pre-game for Mexico.
Tortellini makes me feel like I'm eating hundreds of little vaginas
It was awesome explaining why I had a tiger with boxers in my bed, a little bit drunk, to a girl in a pre-sex moment
Don't make it weird, I don't think about you when I'm climaxing, it's just that I see you rooting me on.
I FEEL LIKE I CAN TAKE DOWN A FULLY GROWN MOUNTAIN LION WITH ONLY A POINTY STICK OH MY GOD
Why is there a water bottle full of red wine on my desk this morning?
See you tonight.
I think now I understand why people say my penis is pretty.
I stared at him for a solid five minutes because he looked like what I imagine god would look like if god was a lumberjack
He's a Republican and an Ohio State fan idk how far this can go.
Do you remember the guy that smelled like hot dogs?
ICE CREAM AND CAKE BITCHESSSSSS
Want to come over and dangle your tits on top of me like a skewer?
He was tied up with the electrical tape and force fed wine from a box. It was never going to end well.
so on the street and some kid is chanting "cheeseburger, cheeseburger, cheeseburger!" while pumping his fist in the air. i agree.
Randomize
