I'm really into asian looking animals
so last night was fun and all.. but you might want to get tested
she fell down the flight of stairs and was fine until she saw the two broken beer bottles on the ground by her.
thats a woman
I enjoy that i have a whole shelf of clothes that I've accumulated from random sex. You know the ones you get to make the morning after look less awkward like similar to an athletes trophy shelf
He asked me to sit on his face, but i didnt, for 2 reasons, one, i had just pooped like 20 mins before sex, and two, this could be my future husband. so i skipped on sitting.
I wish Pampers made couches for people like us.
You'll be the guy with the raft that sells burritos on the river. You'd be legendary.
there is potential here for me to have a consistent access to someone's dick who isn't actually an asshole. i think i'm ready for a relationship.
Every grown women needs to pee herself once in her life. It builds character.
When you wake up, just ignore the mess in the bathroom. I'll take her home when I'm off work.
I just put vodka in my apple sauce. Spice up your fucking life.
I guess I just don't understand how the two main issues with your ex involve a cock ring and a Christmas tree
Im showing up stoned and in sweatpants. Because that is where im at in life right now. Sorry not sorry.
You said the best orgasm you ever had, you gave to yourself. your boyfriend looked really disappointed. so did half the room.
He doesn't understand the concept of a strip club. He keeps falling in love
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