im going to forcibly insert an angry corn snake into his urethra
will power is for people who don't want to get laid
We stole a cat. That is all you need to know.
The moment you ate chicken nuggets out of your purse you were my hero.
Where the hell did i get chicken nuggets from
I never thought that it would get to the point where I would have to specify that by "hang out" I meant "fuck like rabbits." Growing up shouldn't be this way.
i want us to warm up up with us making out while i lay you down touching and feeling all the spots you know are going to get you warmed up. im gonna move down your body kissing every inch as i move down past your panty line ;)
Did you watch the carolina game tonight?
Why are you surprised? I've only ever liked older guys since I was a 3 yr old crushing on her pediatrician.
Fucking someone because they own a lava lamp is like fucking someone because they have 20 dollars and no concern for their house burning down.
Plus it's a good way to scope out guys. Have them fight for you, like real males do in nature.
Awkward sister question: which game of thrones female left would you fuck?
I'm not the one who gave a guy that lives next door to my grandmother a blowjob in a pub bathroom in Ireland, you have no room to judge.
Nothing says depression like laying in your bed stoned, naked, and eating a cupcake
I have finally found someone I enjoy for reasons that do not necessarily include his dick
will a lunchtime blow job make it better?
we found her. shes in the bathtub full of raw pasta. i dont even know...
Randomize
