Who is this?
Who do you want it to be?
Sarah Palin
I've got the updo, bangs, and glasses, but I'm blonde
well that was a long night...
dude, you were pretty messed up... what happened?
no idea... but i still woke up with my pirate hat on
you said youd get me home safely, you dropped me off at 9:30 last night and i just woke up on my porch.
no, i'm proud of you. this is the happiest you've been since you discovered that bowls can be used as cups if you don't feel like washing dishes.
One of my friends found 6 bags of gummy bears on the roof. He lives a building over. Apparently even hammered you still have quite an arm
Did Kevin really put his bar tab under the name Hercules last night?
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
This theraflu would make for a great margarita.
I can make a sudafedarita
I'm petty sure you said "hold on let me make my nipples hard, they look better"
One day this summer I just wanna get blown under the hot sun all day.
Deal. Roof-top 69 on Saturday, July 20th. I've got it in my calendar.
do you want me to tag you in the pics from the party?
Hmm. Use your judgment. Bootlicking pics are probably not ok. Otherwise fine.
I may have had sex with him and told him we wasn't worth my time then went home and made mashed potatoes
She sent me nudes via email. What the fuck are we still in the 90s? Grow up
a girl walked up to me and asked if you were my brother. she shook her head and said 'im so sorry' when i said yes. what did you fucking do????????
You and your dick were a topic of high regard tonight
Randomize
