you kept talking about how hot andy milinakis is and the things you would do with him. no more tequila from him.
what am i going to do when LOST is over? What am i going to get high to?
i shall enjoy my approximately 2 hours of being sober today
my nipple ring is gone but someone was nice enough to replace it with a paperclip
I have to date her we need a place to stay for tailgating
I don't understand why you aren't on this trip all I do is smoke weed drink beer and get fingered
When nipples stop being hilarious I'll stop getting them out in public.
Drunkenly tried to auction off Merik's pancakes at Ihop. Apparently I make a great auctioneer. Also, no one wants 30 cent pancakes.
I've been wearing the same clothes for 3 days and they're covered in franzia
I had no idea he had such passive aggressive animalistic tendencies. This is the human equivalent of peeing on someone.
She's like the King Midas of sexual confusion. Everything she touches turns to gay.
Wow dude wow that's sad man so sad. I dno't event wanna massturbate anymore due to teh sadness
I passed out in your bed last night...there maybe a snickers and twix bar under your pillow
I purposely left my thong and accidentally left my ethics book, hairspray and most of my dignity.
No bra. No panties. Makeup from last night. At work right now. I am trash.
Randomize
