I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
she had condoms in her med. cabinet - magnums -I don't think I'm tall enough for this ride
i walked into the party and i guess everyone knew because they began to chant "ass to mouth"
Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
do you really not remember him getting up at like 4am with a leaf blower running through the house and telling people to "WAKE THE FUCK UPPP"
It's "your husband had his mouth on my vagina" awkward.
Whoevers house this is has only beer and cream cheese in the fridge. Thats the diet im gonna go on
A houseboat for a bachelor party is a terrible idea, we nearly die when on dry land, so how the hell are we supposed to survive a 3 day binge on a massive lake?
She kept grabbing my head and told my faces to stop shaking.. Also, she kept whispering something about seeing flowers in my eyes.
I didn't know he had a girlfriend until after we had sex when he said, "Man I really gotta stop cheating on my girlfriend."
Woke up in a cemetery. Puked in front a funeral ceremony that was going on.
danced like there was no tomorrow. surprise. there's a tomorrow
He is completely naked, curled in a ball, and rocking back and forth in the shower humming lullabies to himself. This is your responsibility since I'm going to be fucking someone in 5.7 seconds.
Y'all let us switch shirts in the middle of 200 people....why did you let me get this drunk by noon?
Omg, new summer goal: sex in a bouncy castle.
Randomize
