is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
they need to just BURY HIM!
The guy in front of me in Sociology is definitely working on my farm in farmville. Never met him before. Do I thank him?
sitting in room practicing taking shots. has my life come to this?
were trying to schedule when i can give him head in between classes.
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
Honestly, I don't care if the only reason she gave me her beer was because she was bisexual and wanted to touch my vagina. Beer is beer.
i havent blinked in 235 seconds. now 247. now 258. 263. 267. 271. i also have been gifted with theability to both type and count and not blink. 293 so magical
I really think that guy just walks around with tennis balls in his pocket. No dick is that big
Drunk. But sober enough to know I hate gymnastics.
Fuck away man. Like 3% of these new people will be back next week. This is the best week of the year to slam bitches at the gym.
Please tell your sister I apologize about saying her baby may have beef curtains. That was inappropriate.
Can u pick me up? Lost my keys.
Sure. FYI- you "lost" them on the roof, trying to throw them over the house.
Now i know i wasnt that drunk... So why are there texts of me volunteering for a nude photo shoot for an art major student?
you know you’re single when you try to cook yourself a nice pasta dinner but you’re too weak to open the container of sauce and theres no one around to help you
Randomize
