Yep. About to get on pornhub to spill some Christmas cheer
No, he attached a coozie to his crutches so he can carry his beer around the party.
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
I tried to get you something for Valentine's Day too but they said they couldn't deliver skittles and ecstasy :(
Stop treating my vagina like a slapchop.
You definitely in your drunken state were really concerned you would forget to buy milk today
I shall welcome him into my body with an open liver and completely lay down all chance of resistance. Sweet Zeus, please take me to Mt. Olympus and share all that is divine. I promise, the secrets will be safe with me
Nah I've been there. The worst you'll see is some hobo peeing in a sewer at 3 am on a Saturday
He FaceTimed me fucking his new girlfriend. He was wearing a banana costume.
He somehow always manages to get me naked within 5 minutes of being together. It's like fucking witchcraft.
Yes. Ice cream tacos are an important aspect in the bridge of friendship
So I just went to clothing optional bar
Sex in a tree, bucket list CHECK!
We'll handle his penis the same way we handle day drinking; together.
I think/hope James is drunk. He's standing in the front lawn loudly declaring "I AM a popsicle!" Over and over....
Randomize
