I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
dude, despite what happened last night, I'm not gay
I'm like a rollypolly, I only open my legs up when I feel safe.
Last night started off great but became the saddest day of my life when i was drunk in a hotel room eating day old mac and cheese out of a yatzee cup with a coffee lid as a spoon...
he needs to stop telling all his friends what my queefs sound like. its getting awkward to be around people who can quote my vagina.
you ever fart during an orgasm? feels like u just lost 10 pounds
Am i fat?
Well i wouldnt let you on top
The theme is smores and alcohol. Dress appropriately.
bars should really give you discounts for bringing your own shot glass
Are you seriously gonna shit with that life vest on?
Your ankle brace is here and the saw is charged. Grab some vodka that cast is coming off tonight.
We hit a golf ball off Brady's ass. His dignity flew away into the night.
A little, yeah. We were stealing firewood from the neighbors (drunk), and figured it would be 10 times harder to be angry with us if we got caught if we were naked, and 100% more hilarious.
I'm starting to think that Cosmic Steve ripped me off
I just bought spray paint, a T-shirt, and a box of magnum condoms. The cashier refused to make eye contact! Haha
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