There's a girl here with sideburns. I gave her your number, you can thank me later.
I an trashes at a wedding. Hotbcousins here I come. Agh.
Ok just saw a girl open a pillbox, dump it out on her notebook and count out 13 adderall tabs and put them in a baggie and leave. Oh hey college.
watching law and order svu marathons. all of the sex crimes cases start like my sat night.
My fingers feel amazing. Their going like 100 MPH!!
HOLY SHIT. SHIT THAT IS HOLY. HOLY OF THE SHIT.
Called my dealer in tears and we talked for an hour until I felt better. That's the way it should be.
those kids just got delivered to the party by the pizza guy
I'm going to sing sad and lonely Barbra Streisand songs at the top of my lungs if you don't get here soon
I let a blind guy feel me up. All he kept saying was "oh fuck yeah!"
My new boobs got me 12 drinks at the concert. Whose the real winner here?
Ims textiofg thsi woht my noes bcuz my hansd aer stli handcuffde to teh bedfrme. Help me
We need a hype man... Like a DMX type dude to just up the ante constantly...
Is it weird that sometimes I like to have sex for the health benefits and workout more than the pleasure
I don't remember much, but I remember he called me the dick whisperer, so it must not have been all bad.
They were so sore! Either I have bed bugs or you were biting my nipples last night and don't lie to me.
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