Just looked at my call log. I called Planned Parenthood at 3am.
Going to get tested monday. You're coming with. Bonding time, slut style.
i gave her road head last night, needless to say it wasn't the same and i bit a chunk of the inside of my cheek off.
For the amount I put out, I should be going on way more dates.
Crisis Situation. How do you have that "we probably shouldn't make out tonight cause i've got an oral herpes outbreak coming on" conversation on a third date.
he was cradling you in his arms feeding you rum straight from the bottle and you kept sucking his fingers.
oh my god. separately texting an Allie and an Ally while drunk is hard, and I'm climbed 1/2 way up a bridge pier.
He just dragged himself across the floor on his back claiming to be "the swiffer" help
How did she break his doorknob?
That was our fault. We put a chair under the doorknob so that she wouldn't wander out of his room in the middle of the night and jump into bed with her ex. But she's stronger than we thought.
It's his sex noise. "I'm gonna cu-THE LORD IS MY SHEPARD AND I SHALL NOT WANT"
i showed up sober to class for the first time. my prof said that i was "off my game today". i love philosophy
How is it that I've hooked up with not one but two guys in the children's section of a bookstore tonight?
They used the ice bucket from their room to drink beer from and called it the "Holy Grail"
Dude...I slept walked to the free condom bin in the lounge last night. I don't know why.
he called me his ex's name during sex then proceeded to cry while still in me
Randomize
