but she was nice to me.
She was a fuckin STRIPPER.
It felt like getting blasted with a supersoaker filled with vagina juice.
I feel like an ass. I'm not blacking out ever again. I want to clean your feet for a year. Just like Jesus did.
so the photographer said "let's get a picture of the cousins" so we posed together, and then he said " lets get a picture of the couples" So we posed together.
He told me I was the only person he wanted to fuck in his rental mini van. Thats so romantic for a fuck buddy relationship.
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
My tuesday consisted of speaking to a federal agent for two hours and watching a roving band of gypsies jump over a fire until 2:30am
We made out a little and then he gave me some weed. I would say it was a pretty productive stop on my way home
I just had a spiritual connection with my sweater and did ballet in the hallway. Alone. I'd say we're gonna chalk that up as a win for marijuana and call it a night
I need to be put in a corner surrounded by pamphlets of stds and babies
you asked the cab driver if he wanted to meet your parents, last night.
Good rule of thumb: only list personal references with whom you have hallucinated
Hope you’re getting action boo.
Definitely no. I woke up next to a bag of McDonald's.
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
Your mom asked you why you had bite marks all over your arms and you answered her by yelling "I HAD A SIESTA!"
Randomize
